Yellow Eggs & Jam

Catch the reference in my title?  I thought I was being clever.  I'm only four days late for Dr. Suess' birthday too.

Just in case you were wondering what sort of oddball mind thinks this way and all those other weird ways about food, I've gotta tell you, I don't have an answer.  Sorry (And in the off chance you don't think it's weird, we should get lunch sometime!  All other diners within hearing perimeter, beware).  But I just recently found this irregular mental architecture of mine has it's origins way back beyond when I was five.  At least that's some of the earliest evidence I have of it.

My grandmother was recently doing some cleaning in her room, walked into the kitchen, said that I might want to take a look at something after which she laid this on the counter and walked out.

Hmmm...ok Grandma.  I'll take a gander at it.  Oh look.  Aw, how cute.  I must've given that to her when I was little.  I was such a sweet little boy.

I was such a weird little boy. 

"...remember all your colors & shapes....remember all the colors in the rainbow"??

Really Ian?

I think my parents' note at the bottom was for fear that my grandmother might think they were in the smallest way responsible for that rather transcendental composition.

Possibly cute for a five-year-old.  Also really funny.  With the color scheme I've got going there, I must've been thinking of Fruit Loops or about the Lucky Charms rainbow or something.

I've been keeping busy over break.  Usually steamy, bubbling, molten concoctions evoke rather hellish imagery.  Not this one though.  I'll possibly have to save a post about this for later.

One of my family's favorite past times is bringing cookies to various places.  It's amazing how many people want to be your friend when you've got cookies.  In high school all the teachers loved my brothers and me because we would frequently bring in a whole tray of homemade cookies.  I think they were sad after Matt graduated not so much because they loved us but since it meant no more Mama Mac's cookies.

But today the roles were reversed.  Being home for spring break, it was my turn to make them for mi madre to bring to school.

Doesn't it look like the the outside of a cavernous, dark hole in the side of a mountain high up in the air, the ground frosted with a light covering of snow that has briefly melted only to freeze in the cool, night air creating a beautifully dangerous landscape that must be negotiated with awed care?  That'd be one cave I wouldn't mind visiting.  If only I could go spelunking in an cookie.  Life would be complete.  I wouldn't even mind getting lost in that cave.  I'd never go hungry!

Despite all temptation and wild daydreams, I wouldn't dare eat these.  Not today.  I'm the kind of thoughtful son who knows that they have another purpose...bribery.

And if I'm not going to eat one, them I'm sure not going to take any chances that someone else may eat one!!

But since this is already a really long post, I'm gonna blow through the main section.  No extravagant dinner or dessert out here.  Simple home-stuff.

 Home-made bread in the toaster.  Can't beat that!

 Eggs....jam....I know where he's going with this...

...jammed toast (is that a real adjective?) served with a nice omelet on the side.

...or is it?

Didn't see that coming did you?  A jam and egg sandwich.  I know people like their cheese and eggs, but believe me, you have to try jam and eggs.  It doesn't seem like that strange a combination to me (then again that's me speaking), but most of the time when I mention it to people, or better yet when they see me eat it, all I get is this really weird face contortion directed right at me. 

Anyway, since I'm constructing this little beauty, the godbite has to be planned from the beginning.  My favorite part of the slice is the crust.  People whine and complain about crusts, and some even cut them off.  But this isn't your pitiful supermarket brand featuring a measly excuse for a crust which is really more of a sad attempt to block you from the ecstasy of the fluffy, white interior.  This crust has real bite and complements the chewy insides.  Thus, you'll notice the heavier loading of jam along the top crust.

Bon appetite!  Give it a try some time.